Relationality Lab

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Our Story

Relationality Lab was founded out of a deep frustration with the way that relational work is often rendered invisible and under resourced.

In the midst of a global loneliness crisis we need this work more than ever: to create connection and care, to strengthen democracies across the globe, and to grow movements capable of addressing the climate crisis and systemic inequity.

We work towards a future where people who do the work of relationship are recognized and resourced for the value that they create. To get there, we help institutions understand and invest in relational outcomes.

What We Do

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Movement Strategy

How might your organization strategically invest in relationship? Who might you invite into relationship and how might you prepare for unpredictable but strategically relevant results? Is your organization already part of larger movements that share your values? How might participating in them further your mission?

Coming Soon

Relational Operations

Once you know who you want to invite into relationship how do you create the conditions for those relationships to flourish? This requires an ecology of relational containers: large tentpole events interspersed with smaller more frequent gatherings. How do you build a robust ecology with limited resources?

Coming Soon

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Relational Data Practice

Once you’ve invested time and resources in building relationship how do you understand the impact of your work? How do you prove that impact to external stakeholders such as funders? How might we collect data about relational outcomes if those outcomes matter but cannot be predicted or controlled?

Learn More

Book cover for Relationality: How Moving from Transactional to Transformational Relationships Can Reshape Our Lonely World

Book: Relationality

"At once radical and sensible, with the potential to mitigate a great deal of sadness and pain."
—ANDREW SOLOMON, author of Far From the Tree

Relationships add immense value to our lives, yet the work of nurturing those relationships is all too often under-recognized and under-resourced.

Relationality is for people who believe in the power of relationship but who struggle inside of institutions that cannot see that power. It equips professionals, activists, and community organizers with the knowledge they need to fight for resources and build organizational cultures that center the work of building relationship.

The book includes:

A history of why so many institutions fail to effectively invest in relationship
A framework for discussing effective measurement and impact reporting for relational work
A call to repair lineages of relational wisdom that have been extracted from and forgotten
A guide to creating the conditions for relationship that draws from both scientific research and established organizing practice
A vision for how the world might radically change if those who nurture relationship are rewarded for the value that they create

With isolation and loneliness on the rise, Relationality offers a roadmap toward a world of abundant connection: one where individuals, organizations, and democratic societies know how to invest in the relationships they need to thrive.

Relationality is published by North Atlantic Books and is available wherever books are sold.

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Team

David Jay
Founder

David’s movement roots begin in St. Louis, Missouri, where he practiced racial justice and LGBTQ+ organizing in high school. At the age of 18 he founded Asexuality.org, the world’s first major community of people identifying on the asexual spectrum, and began a career at the intersection of relational organizing and technology. He has contributed to software projects supporting post-publication scientific peer review, relational organizing in political campaigns, online brave spaces for LGBTQ+ young people, and comment systems at major news publications. Until recently he served as the Chief Mobilization Officer at the Center for Humane Technology, using relational tactics to bring together tech workers, policymakers, and survivors of harm to bring about systemic reform in the tech industry.

For over a decade, David has explored ways to combine established approaches in complex systems science, information theory, and evolutionary theory to address novel challenges in the study of relational systems in social movements. David holds a BA in Sociology and Physics from Wesleyan University and an MBA in Sustainable Business from the Presidio Graduate School.